Outlaw (The Hidden Planet Book 3) Read online

  “That’s why you don’t date,” I say the words before I even consider their ramifications, but Hayden doesn’t freak out or get upset.

  “That’s why I don’t date,” she confirms. “A lot can happen when you fall in love, Gaz. Sometimes it’s easier not to let that happen. I was broken once. I don’t know if I could go through that again.”

  “I would never break you, Hayden,” I whisper, but the catch of her breath lets me know that she heard me: loud and clear.

  *

  As far as bars go, Galaxy is an incredible one. It’s not one of the those, dingy places with a disreputable crowd. No, Galaxy is the biggest bar in Diamond and one of the most expensive. Fortunately for me, money isn’t an issue. While Hayden doesn’t make nearly as much as me, she’s thrifty and good with her money, and she enjoys a night out at Galaxy just as much as I do.

  We head to a quiet table at the back of the bar. As soon as we sit, Hayden punches our orders into the screen on the wall beside the table. Then she swipes it away.

  “What’s your pleasure?” She asks.

  “Oceans,” I tell her, and she presses another button. Images of calm oceans from different planets appear on the wall where the menu was previously displayed.

  “You know, not all bars have these features.”

  “I’m well aware. Ezra and Quinn both like the quainter ones, the ones that are more Earth-ish.”

  It’s only a second later when our robotic server appears and sets our drinks down in front of us before vanishing to deliver drinks to another table.

  “To us,” Hayden says.

  “To us,” I hold up my drink, and I take a sip. Hayden looks around as we drink. It’s still early in the afternoon, which means the bar should be empty, but it’s not. It’s filled with people from every planet imaginable, which is strange for a place like Sapphira. I would have expected nearly everyone in the bar to be blue, but there are a multitude of planets represented here. At a glance, I see people from Mars, Mirroean, and even Dreagle.

  “I like the diversity here,” Hayden comments.

  “It’s unlike anywhere else on Sapphira, for sure.”

  “We’ve come a long way as a planet, but it would be nice to see more people from different places. Growing up, learning about what exists outside of the Hidden Planet was hard.”

  “I can imagine,” I tell her, but that’s all I can do: imagine. I grew up on Orchid with private tutors from different planets whose sole purpose was to teach me about their culture. Learning about other places was never difficult for me, and it’s why Sapphira was the perfect choice when I chose to leave Orchid.

  Sapphira is a place not many people choose to travel to because it’s still so far apart from the rest of the planets. Sapphirans, even after all of this time, still like to keep to themselves.

  That’s just fine with me.

  When I came here, it was to study law and then open my own practice. I wanted to help people in a practical way. What I didn’t want was to be forced to travel, especially back to Orchid.

  “So, about this whole Trevor thing,” she says. Hayden has already finished half of her drink.

  “I’m dropping him,” I interrupt her before she can even start talking.

  “What?”

  “I’m dropping him as a client, effective immediately. I’ll notify him tomorrow.”

  “But why?” She asks, looking around the bar. No one is paying us any attention, though. She has nothing to worry about. “Even with this new evidence, Gaz, you’re good. You’re the best. You can win this.”

  “I know,” I tell her. “But I don’t want to.”

  “What aren’t you telling me?” She narrows her eyes at me. “Does this have something to do with the Orchidians coming to Sapphira?”

  Now it’s my turn to look around.

  “Don’t worry. No one knows your secret.” She jerks her head toward my shoes. “I don’t even think Izzie realizes which planet you’re really from. You want to talk about that today?”

  Leave it to Hayden to uncover all of the things I want to keep hidden. Despite our friendship, that’s another thing we’ve never talked about: why I feel it necessary to hide my origins.

  “Not particularly.”

  “Good,” Hayden says. She turns to the screen beside us and orders another round of drinks. Then she motions to me. “This round’s on you.”

  I press my thumb to the sensor on the wall and it registers my fingerprint and payment information I set up the last time we visited this bar. It makes sliding in and out of this place unnoticed very simple and easy, and it also means I don’t have to deal with sorting through cash, although on Sapphira, almost no one uses cash anymore.

  The drinks arrive almost instantly and Hayden slams her drink down again.

  “Maybe you’re the one who had the bad day,” I eye her curiously, but she shakes her head.

  “I’m fine,” she says, but she’s lying to me, and I don’t know why.

  Chapter 3

  Hayden

  I’m lying to him.

  I’m not fine.

  I haven’t been fine for a very, very long time, and drinking today probably isn’t the best of ideas because today is the anniversary of the day I was taken. I don’t want to be alone today and even though both of my brothers sent me messages to make sure I’m fine, I still feel sad.

  The truth is that the one person who could probably help me is Gaz. He’s the only one who doesn’t baby me, who doesn’t treat me like some precious cargo. It’s not that I mind my brothers being gentle or caring with me, but sometimes I want to be treated like a woman and not a victim.

  Sometimes I want to forget that I was raped and tormented.

  Sometimes I just want to feel normal.

  The closest I’ve ever gotten to that is hanging out with Gaz. When I’m around him, he treats me like a friend, a confidante. He treats me perfectly normally and doesn’t worry about censoring his language or his ideas. He knows I can handle anything he throws my way, so he throws it, and I like that.

  Both Quinn and Ezra tend to gloss over the hard facts when it comes to sharing information. I know exactly how they each met their mates because the women told me, shared with me. If it wasn’t for the girls, I never would have known the true stories because my brothers each fed me these sanitized versions of what actually happened.

  Well, I’m an adult, and not a new one, either. I’m almost 30 years old, and I deserve to be treated that way.

  Gaz treats me that way.

  Now he’s sitting in front of me, and he’s giving me the opportunity to open up to him. The question is whether or not I’m actually brave enough for that. I’m already completely in love with him, but love isn’t just about feelings, is it? I’ve learned a lot in the last decade, and one thing I know now, more than anything else, is that love requires risk and sacrifice.

  Am I willing to risk my privacy to tell Gaz the truth?

  Am I willing to sacrifice my fear in order to open up to him?

  I might need another drink for this.

  I reach for the wall to order another round, but I feel Gaz’s hand gently wrap around my wrist. I look down at it, and then up at him. His gaze is gentle.

  “Hayden,” he says softly. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” He looks so open and sweet, so gentle. Right now, he’s not the lawyer or the shark. Right now, he’s not a scary attorney demanding justice for his clients. He’s not the powerful man I’ve come to associate with those damn suits he wears.

  No, right now, he’s just Gaz.

  My Gaz.

  And I realize that even if it costs me something, I’m willing to pay up. I’m willing to sacrifice my own emotions and terror because I really do want to open up to someone, and I want that someone to be Gaz.

  “You know I was kidnapped,” I say slowly.

  “I know,” he growls, and his eyes narrow, but I know he’s not mad at me. He’s just sad about what happened to me. I am, too. It wasn’t fair.
Then again, nothing about life is ever really fair. Losing my parents at a young age wasn’t fair. Being raised by my aunt wasn’t fair. Growing up the only girl in a house with two overbearing brothers wasn’t fair.

  Being hurt wasn’t fair.

  “It was ten years ago today,” I admit. “And even though I think I should be over it by now, the truth is that I’m not,” I shake my head. “Sometimes, I even still have nightmares. I know logically that he’s gone, that he can never hurt me again, but sometimes, I still feel scared, Gaz. Today is a hard day for me because even though so much time has passed, I remember exactly what it felt like to be taken. I remember the exact moment I realized what was happening, and I remember the terror that swept over me.”

  Before I realize what’s happening, Gaz is on my side of the table and his arms are wrapped around me. He pulls me so close to himself that I can hear his heartbeat, and suddenly, I feel at peace. The anxiety that’s been plaguing me all day disappears as I relax into his touch because I know that Gaz will never hurt me.

  I know that he’ll do anything he can to protect me, to keep me safe, and the thought makes me feel like crying from sheer relief.

  “I’m sorry about what that bastard did to you. I’m even sorrier I didn’t kill the fucker.”

  I’ve never heard Gaz talk like this, but I shake my head.

  “You did everything you could.”

  “Your brothers and I should have hunted him down like the dog he is.”

  “Gaz, I…”

  “What is it, Hayden?” He lifts my chin and looks at me, really looks at me. Feminine energy rushes through my body as I suddenly become aware of the fact that today doesn’t feel like two friends hanging out. It feels like a date, but it shouldn’t. Gaz doesn’t think of me that way.

  My hands are pressed against his hard chest, and I let them roam for a minute before I shake my head.

  “Nothing, I…let’s just keep drinking, okay?” I pull out of his grasp and order us another round of drinks. “This one’s on me,” I tell him.

  Is it just me, or does he look a little disappointed?

  The drinks come, but Gaz doesn’t make any attempt to return to his side of the table. Instead, he stays next to me, protecting me, and I like that. It feels comfortable, and this time, I sip my drink a little slower. Already I’m starting to feel a little buzzed. There’s music playing, and I let the sound wash over me.

  “I’m sorry about what happened to you,” Gaz finally says after a long time. “It’s not easy having bad things happen to us.”

  “You know about that, don’t you?” I ask him softly. Gaz doesn’t talk about Orchid. He doesn’t talk about his family or his life there or why he left. I have my suspicions about him, but I’ve never pushed him to tell me anything about his life. I’ve never pushed him to explain.

  “There are things in life that are so dramatic they shape who we are,” he says finally. “Sometimes, something bad happens, but it’s like high tide at the beach. It happens, but then it’s over, and everything goes back to normal. When you have a sandcastle you’ve spent hours building, though, and that tide comes in and crushes all of your hard work, it changes things.”

  “It damages you.”

  “It does.”

  “What happened to you, Gaz?” I look up at him and for a minute, I think he’s going to tell me, but then he shakes his head.

  “That’s a story for another day, love. That’s a story for another day.”

  I try to hide my disappointment, but Gaz isn’t falling for it.

  “Don’t look so sad, Hayden,” he murmurs, pressing his lips to my forehead. Before I can read too much into the gesture, he pulls me to my feet and begins to dance with me right next to our table. A few people turn to stay, but most of them ignore us.

  “Gaz!”

  “What is it, beautiful?”

  “This isn’t that type of place. We aren’t allowed to dance here.”

  “Is there a sign that says we can’t dance here?”

  “Well, no, but people are staring.”

  “Let them stare. Let them be jealous I’m dancing with the most beautiful woman in this bar. Let them look at us, Hayden. Let them.”

  He pulls me closer to himself and this time, I lean against Gaz and fall in step with his movements. This time, I close my eyes and just let him lead this movement. This time, I let him take care of me the way I’ve never let anyone take care of me.

  “You always have to be so strong, don’t you?” He whispers, and I shake my head, but we both know he’s right. I don’t let people see me get scared. Not anymore. I was scared once, long ago, and now?

  Now I know better.

  Predators love it when you’re afraid. They love it when you get scared. They can smell your fear and they thrive on it. They can sense it. After Hector stole my innocence from me, after I outsmarted him and escaped from his fucking mansion, I promised myself I would never be weak again.

  I would never let myself crack.

  I would never show anyone the things that hurt me.

  And until recently, I’d been doing just fine. I’d been strong and smart and quick, but then something changed. Maybe it’s because my brothers are both so damn happy. Maybe I finally realized that being vulnerable isn’t always a terrible thing.

  “I’m here for you, Hayden.” Gaz strokes my hair as we dance, and the rest of the world seems to just fade away. He touches me, and I don’t feel so alone. I don’t feel so isolated. When he runs his hands down my back and holds me at my waist, I don’t feel violated.

  I feel safe.

  I feel secure.

  I feel comforted.

  When I’m in Gaz’s arms, I feel better than I ever have before, and that’s a dangerous feeling: one I’m not sure what to do with.

  Eventually, he leads me back to our table and we sit down. Once more, we’re side-by-side. I lean my head against Gaz as he starts to tell me stories about his job, about his experiences when he first moved to Sapphira, about learning to be an alien on a strange planet.

  And when I close my eyes and start to fall asleep, it’s with the knowledge that no matter what happens, Gaz will always be here to take care of me. He’ll always be by my side. He’ll always protect me.

  I can trust him.

  Chapter 4

  Gaz

  The sun hasn’t even set yet, but already, Hayden is asleep. While drinking at Galaxy, she passed out at the bar, though it was from exhaustion and not drunkenness. When I scoop her up in my arms, a Mirroean approaches me.

  “Everything all right, here?” He crosses his arms over his chest and jerks his head toward Hayden.

  “Quite,” I tell the man. He’s shorter than me, but he’s muscular and looks strong. Though I’m sure I would win in a fight, there’s no question he’d give me a run for my money. “My friend fell asleep and I’m going to take her home.”

  “You sure about that?” The man asks. It’s then that I notice the nearly invisible talk goo in his ear. So he’s working for someone. Whoever has the other piece of talk goo in their ear can hear everything the two of us are saying. It’s not an uncommon practice on Sapphira. Talk goo was discovered here, after all, but it’s still annoying.

  “You security?” I jerk my head toward his ear, and he frowns. So that’s it, then. Galaxy is known for being one of the safest bars on the planet. Apparently, this is why. “Look, this is my friend. You can call my secretary if you like and confirm that I know this woman and that I’m just taking her back to her house.”

  “Acceptable,” the man says, and I tell him to call Izzie. When an image of her flickers to life in front of the man’s communications unit, she starts talking a million miles a minute.

  “What the hell is going on?” She screeches. “This is my afternoon off. I’m supposed to be relaxing! I don’t want to spend today dealing with jerks who can’t even be bothered to properly check that a woman is being kidnapped or not.” My body tenses because that’s exactly what�
��s happening.

  This guy wants to make sure I’m not stealing Hayden.

  He’s protecting her, just as I am, just as I wasn’t able to do when she was a kid.

  “Ma’am, can you confirm the identity of your superior and the name of his companion?”

  Izzie lists off our ID numbers and begins chewing the guy out. Meanwhile, we’ve drawn a little bit of attention, which I don’t like. The entire point of living on the Hidden Planet is to be, well, hidden.

  I don’t particularly want people looking at me or taking notice of me. Fortunately, Izzie has two things going for her that I don’t. First of all, she’s blue. She’s got dark blue skin and dark blue hair and on the sapphire planet, those things matter. Secondly, she’s a woman, and she’s not afraid to use her gender as a way to get what she wants. While my methods of persuading the security guy might be reasonable enough, Izzie goes full mother-hen on the guy and guilts him for even considering that I might be a threat.

  Finally, he turns and tells me I’m free to go.

  “And tell the fucker listening in not to bother Mr. Oleandair again,” Izzie is saying. “You, sir, are a walking lawsuit waiting to happen.” Security Guy looks more and more overwhelmed before finally just ending the call between Izzie and himself.

  “You should go,” he says to me, looking around. Apparently, the gathered crowd was actually listening to the things Izzie was saying and now, instead of looking at me like I’m a complete dick, they’re looking at me like I’m some sort of hero for taking care of Hayden.

  That feeling is much better.

  I take Hayden outside and gently lower her into my hovercar. When I climb in, I don’t bother trying to drive back to her place. Instead, I tell my car the address and sit back while it navigates the roads of Diamond back to Hayden’s home. I stare out the window while the car moves because I don’t want to stare at Hayden.