Below Deck Page 5

  “Please, Ryder,” she whispers, begging me. “I can’t wait anymore.”

  “You don’t have to, princess, because I’m going to die if I have to wait one more second to have you.”

  I slide into her in one quick thrust, and June’s entire body quivers as I enter her.

  “Ryder…”

  “Fuck, baby, you’re so tight.”

  “More,” she groans, and I thrust in and out of June as I grip her hips tightly. She can’t move as I make love to her, as I fuck her. She’s forced to remain in place and just accept what I’m offering her, and June looks more submissive and more beautiful than I’ve ever seen her.

  I can feel her clenching around me as I move faster and faster.

  “Baby, if you don’t stop, I’m not going to last long,” I warn her. June chuckles and squeezes me so tightly that I almost lose my self-control. I’m not some teenage kid, though. This isn’t my first time. This isn’t my first sexual experience.

  I need to make this perfect.

  June and I have been dancing around this relationship for a long time, but it’s time for us to move forward. It’s time for us to make this happen.

  It’s time.

  I flick my fingers over her clit and she comes again. She comes apart beautifully and this time, I come with her. I come with June, groaning through my release, and when we’re both sated, I press my lips against the back of her neck.

  “You were perfect,” I whisper, and then I move to untie her. June is quiet and sits carefully as I slowly unwind the rope from her body. She doesn’t protest or complain when it takes awhile. Finally, I finish with the rope and set it aside.

  “I could go for a shower,” I tell her.

  “Me too,” she says.

  “I’ll get it started.” I head into the bathroom and turn the water on, checking to make sure it’s at a good temperature. I turn to the mirror and splash some water on my face, but then I hear my phone ringing.

  Fuck.

  I hurry out to the bedroom, but I’m too late. June is sitting on the floor next to my pants holding both of my cell phones in her hands. She looks up at me, confused.

  “Ryder, why do you have two cell phones?”

  Chapter 11

  June

  When I was a little girl, I always believed I could do whatever I set my heart on. I thought that no matter how big my dreams were, I could reach them if I only believed hard enough. If I worked hard enough, pushed hard enough, I’d be able to accomplish anything.

  And I have.

  I put myself through school and I opened my own, very successful, business.

  I’ve done a lot in my 30 years, but it all boils down to this moment.

  This is the moment I’ve been waiting for.

  This is the moment where I find out why Ryder isn’t who he seems to be. I didn’t mean to snoop through his pants, but when his phone started to ring, I figured he’d want to take the call. I thought finding the phone would be helpful: not harmful.

  So I reached into his pants and I found the phone.

  But it wasn’t the one ringing.

  There was another phone.

  So this is it?

  This is Ryder’s big secret?

  He has an alternate identity?

  I kind of figured that.

  Still, a man who has two very different, very separate cell phones has to have some pretty good secrets.

  I’m looking forward to the story.

  ***

  Ryder

  June is staring at my phones like they’re on fire, like they’re the worst thing she’s ever seen.

  “I can explain,” I tell her, hurrying into the room, but I already know that it’s too late. It’s too late because now, no matter what happens, June will always think I’m a liar. She’ll always think I’m suspicious. No matter what happens next, she’ll always suspect I’m withholding information when I talk to her about a problem or an issue.

  She’ll always wonder what’s true.

  Can I really blame her if she walks away now?

  “Okay,” she says, and hands me the phones. There’s a missed call from my boss, but he’ll have to wait. I can call him back in am minute.

  Then she sits down on the bed and pats the spot next to her. “So explain it.”

  “That’s it?” I ask, surprised. “You actually want me to explain?”

  “You just offered to,” she says, looking confused. “Did I misunderstand?”

  “No, it’s just…” I breathe a sigh of relief and sit down beside her. “I guess I just figured that you wouldn’t actually want to hear what I have to say.”

  “Ryder, you’re not making any sense. I asked you why you have two phones. I didn’t ask you for a dramatic back story or ask some really personal question. I know you aren’t who you say you are.” I must look horrified, because she throws her head back and laughs. “I mean, come on, Ryder Hawke? What is this? Like your fan fiction name or something? I run a sex club, Ryder. I’m not dumb. Are you an undercover reporter or something?”

  She looks at me with interest and curiosity: not with anger or malice.

  “What?”

  “Your phones,” she says. “Are you a reporter? You know, some people have very particular jobs and they have to keep all of their work calls separate from their personal ones. Is that what’s happening with you?”

  “Something like that,” I tell her.

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Yes,” I say honestly. “I’d like nothing better, but I can’t right now.” As much as I want to come clean with June, I can’t risk sacrificing this mission. I can’t sacrifice catching this bastard. He’s been running this smuggling ring far too long. He needs to be stopped and I’m the only one who can do it.

  I just hope it’s not too late.

  “Oh,” she says. Then she takes a deep breath and kisses me on the cheek. “Well, I’m sure you’ll tell me as soon as you can,” she says, and then June wraps her arms around me and smiles. “You missed a call. If you want to call them back, that’s totally fine. I’ll be waiting for you in the shower.”

  Then she gets up and sashays into the bathroom, leaving me staring at the phone and wondering how the hell I managed to find someone so fantastic.

  June didn’t yell, didn’t shout. She didn’t get upset. She just supported me, and that’s how a relationship is supposed to work. It’s not how they usually work, of course. We all have drama and baggage and childhood issues we bring to relationships. We all have our own troubles that can impact whether or not a relationship is successful, but June is going above and beyond.

  She’s demonstrating complete and utter trust in me, and that’s such a rare thing.

  The bathroom door closes and suddenly, I’m alone. I’ve got to call my supervisor back and find out what’s going on. He rarely calls me unless there’s been some sort of development on the case. Usually, I’m the one who calls him, so it must be important.

  I grab my phone, hit his number, and ring him back.

  Jake answers on the first ring.

  “Ryder,” he says. “It’s go time.”

  Chapter 12

  June

  When I step into the shower, I feel like a different person than I was an hour ago.

  I shouldn’t, but I do.

  Something changed when Ryder tied me up. Something shifted deep inside of me when we were together that way. Maybe it’s because I’ve never offered up my trust to a Dominant partner the way I did tonight. Oh, I’ve played with Doms and Dommes before, but tonight was different.

  Tonight was a surrender, and I think he knew it.

  Ryder and I have been dancing around this for awhile now, but tonight was the first night we finally let go.

  It feels good.

  The water washes over me and I realize that he was able to completely get me out of my own head. For a little while, I wasn’t worried about how sorry I feel for myself about losing Grams. I wasn’t thinking about
how sad I am or how lonely. I wasn’t thinking about feeling overwhelmed with work.

  For a little while, I was just me.

  For a little while, I was just a sweet submissive with her Dom, and it felt magical.

  It felt wonderful.

  I never want that feeling to go away.

  I hear the bathroom door open and a minute later, Ryder pulls back the shower curtain.

  “Hey,” I say, turning around. “Are you going to join me?”

  Only, Ryder’s dressed.

  “I can’t,” he says, shaking his head.

  “Work emergency?” He didn’t explain why he has two phones, but I’ve been waiting for a long time for Ryder to trust me. He doesn’t have to trust me today. He doesn’t even have to trust me tomorrow. As long as I know that we’re slowly, carefully working toward that, I’m happy.

  Sleeping together wasn’t just about the sex for me. I know it wasn’t for him, either. We’ve been teasing, talking, and kissing for weeks now. It was time to make a move or give up trying, and I’m glad we slept together. I’m still a little sore from the spanking, still a little stiff from the ropes, but I feel good. I feel solid and grounded.

  I feel complete.

  “Yes,” he says regretfully, shaking his head. “Look, June, I’ll explain everything when I get back. Just know that I don’t have a secret family or anything like that.”

  I cut him off and start laughing.

  “Hey!” He protests.

  “You couldn’t pull it off, sweetie,” I say, playfully tapping his nose. A drop of water slides down from the spot I touched. “No offense,” I shrug. “I mean, you’re a pretty good liar, but I would have figured that one out a long time ago and invited your wife to the club.”

  “I could pull it off,” he says, and then he shakes his head, as if he’s realizing he’s arguing about his ability to lie. Not exactly the best way to start a relationship, is it?

  “Hey,” I say, turning off the showerhead and reaching for a towel. Ryder steps back and I wrap the towel around myself and place my hands on his chest. “You have nothing to worry about, okay? I know that if you could tell me what’s going on, you would, Ryder. I trust you,” I say, and when those words cross my lips, Ryder lets out an audible sigh of relief.

  This poor man.

  Has no one ever believed him before?

  Obviously, Ryder does something that’s not just writing mystery novels. He’s got some sort of job that’s so private and important that he has to carry a second cell phone for it. Maybe he’s a spy or maybe he’s a private investigator.

  I don’t know, and I don’t really care.

  Knowing Ryder’s secret would mean the world to me, but I also understand the legalities involved in having some sort of classified job. All of my members at Anchored sign a non-disclosure agreement that says what happens at the club stays at the club. If someone sees a state senator getting spanked, that’s not something the media or the general public needs to know about.

  No, I understand privacy just fine, and I understand that right now, Ryder has something he needs to do without me.

  He kisses me then, long and hard, and then he pulls back.

  “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he says.

  “I’ll be waiting.”

  He leaves, and I wander back to my bed, throw off the towel, and slide between the covers. I didn’t bother to brush out my hair and I know that in the morning, it’ll be a tangled mess, but I don’t really care.

  Ryder Hawke made love to me and now everything feels okay.

  Everything feels right.

  Chapter 13

  Ryder

  Everything feels right.

  I speed the entire way to the scene where Martin Peterson is in the process of being arrested.

  I completely missed my team bringing him down. While I was with June, the guy doing surveillance had a gut feeling and went for it, calling everyone in. Sure enough, Martin had a deal going down tonight and because Charles made the right call, they were able to catch him in the act.

  Finally, after all of this time, the case is closed.

  And I missed the grand finale.

  The entire thing.

  To my surprise, I don’t care at all.

  I park my car and hurry over to the other undercover agents who have been working with me on surveillance. Charles is looking prouder than I’ve ever seen him. Haley is smiling, grinning from ear-to-ear as Martin is cuffed and shoved in the back of a car.

  “I can’t believe it,” she says, smiling at me. “We finally brought the fucker down and now we can go home.”

  “Fuck yes,” Charles agrees. “We’ve been gone way too long.”

  “You missed all the action, big boy!” Haley says. They called me while I was with June, but when I called Jake back, I told him not to hold back, not to wait. With a case like this, there might only be one shot, and they had to take it.

  That totally paid off because now we have enough evidence to put this guy and most of his crew away for a very, very long time.

  “I know, but it looks like you guys had everything under control.”

  Charles looks me up and down and gives me a confused look. This isn’t how I normally am and he knows it. Usually, I always want to be the first one on the scene. I live for catching the bad guys and the more action, the better.

  Only things are different now.

  My life has changed.

  I’ve changed.

  I don’t want to go back to Nellenston. Oh, I’m going to have to, of course. There’s going to be paperwork to deal with. There’s going to be a lot of fucking paperwork to deal with, but the minute that’s over, I’m getting my ass right back to Westbrook and I’m going to marry June Gables.

  I’m going to marry her and make her mine forever because June is my missing half.

  She calms me, pushes me, teases me.

  She entrances me.

  Nobody else makes me feel the way that she makes me feel, and there’s no way I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to find someone who does. No, June is it for me. I’ve never been much for dating. I’ve had relationships, of course, but there’s never been anyone who made my heart stop.

  There’s never been anyone who made my soul sing.

  “So who is she?” Haley smirks as I look from her to Charles and back again.

  “Excuse me?” I ask, blinking innocently.

  “You reek of sex, man,” Haley laughs. “And besides, we’re not dumb. I know you spend your weekends at that club, and the last couple of weeks, you’ve been more distracted than usual.”

  “That is true,” Charles says, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “You have been acting a bit strange.”

  I just laugh and shake my head, and then I look up at the early morning sun starting to rise.

  It’s going to be a wonderful day.

  It’s going to be a wonderful life.

  Chapter 14

  June

  I’m standing in the center of one of the stages when Ryder walks in.

  “FBI, huh?” I ask, jerking my head toward his vest. “I probably should have guessed.”

  “I’m surprised you couldn’t tell with all of my incredible muscles,” Ryder flexes and I laugh loudly.

  “I probably should have figured it out,” I agree. “So,” I say, sitting at the edge of the stage. “Did you catch the bad guy?”

  “I caught the bad guy.”

  “What happens now?” I ask. “Do you have to go back home? I don’t even know where home is for you. I assume you aren’t actually from Westbrook.”

  “I’m from Nellenston,” he says, sitting next to me. “And I do have to go back to finish wrapping up some details on the case.”

  So that’s it, then?

  Is this thing between us over?

  How can I ask him without sounding completely desperate, completely broken?

  Only Ryder, sweet Ryder, seems to know what I’m worried about before I even ask.
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  “June, what happened between us…”

  “Can’t happen again,” I say, finishing his sentence. “I understand.”

  And I do.

  Because I’m an adult woman.

  This is how relationships work; this is how one night flings work.

  “What? That’s not what I want,” he shakes his head. Then he tilts my chin up toward him. “Is that what you want, June?”

  “No,” I whisper, and it’s the truth. “I don’t want it to be over, Ryder.”

  “Then it’s not going to be over.”

  “What are you talking about?” I shake my head. “I can’t leave all of this, Ryder. I…I have a life here, a business. I know we could always do long-distance, but…”

  But the thought of him being so far away crushes my heart and I don’t know if I can handle it.

  I don’t know if I’m that strong.

  “I turned in my notice, baby,” he says.

  “Ryder?” I search his eyes. “What do you mean? You turned in your notice? Why? Baby, are you sure?” I shake my head. “I can’t be the reason you leave the FBI, Ryder. This is a huge decision.”

  “I agree,” he says. “But it’s something I’ve been thinking about for awhile. June, when I met you, everything changed. Suddenly, I had a purpose that was greater than my job, more important. When we started hanging out and getting to know each other, I knew one night wasn’t going to be enough with you. I knew I’d need more.”

  “What are you saying, Ryder?”

  “I’ve already talked to Maddox,” he says gently. “He’s going to write me a letter of recommendation to join the local police force. It’ll mean I can be here with you, June. It’ll mean we can be together.”

  “You’d do that for me, Ryder?”

  “I love you, June Gables. Please, tell me you know this.”

  “I love you, Ryder Hawke.”

  He laughs. “That’s not my last name, actually, but I’m glad to hear those words on your lips, sweetheart. I’ve been waiting a long time to hear them.”